How to manage strong emotions?
How are you feeling about the election results? Are you feeling shocked, angry, sad, terrified? Maybe you are feeling excited, hopeful, happy? Do you want to hide under the covers, get drunk, stoned or bing eat?
This election may have brought out a lot of strong feelings that are fed by our negative or positive thinking. So we are either spinning in a tornado of fears or tornado of excitement, that are not based on the present moment, instead they rise from our anticipation of the unknown.
Our feelings are an important part of our human experience, and they guide us as we move through life in search of happiness. We cannot deny or ignore our feelings otherwise they will manifest in a variety of ways. They can cause a regretful reaction, overwhelm us or cause paralysis.
How do we process strong feelings? By allowing yourself to feel how you feel.
Our emotions are energy that needs to be experienced. If we suppress our emotions, they just don’t go away. Our emotions stay inside and at some point in the future, they will rise out of us and bite us in the butt. To fully express your emotions let it fly. If you need to throw a fit, have a tantrum and yell and scream. If sadness is coming up, enjoy a snot-filled fit of crying complete with a full box of tissue. If anger is flowing, then grab a pair of boxing gloves and release that anger on a heavy punching bag. Whatever you are feeling, allow the energy to move through you. Hold a safe space for yourself and go apeshit crazy. Be aware of when you feel your emotions begin to feed distressing thoughts and emotions. Let out the emotion in whatever way makes you feel better without adding to the drama and trauma.Hold a safe space for yourself and go apeshit crazy.
Practice Mindfulness using the AAA Method (Allow, Acknowledge, Accept).
The reality is we can’t control the future, and we can’t control others and their actions. The only thing we can do is learn to manage our reactions, acknowledge our emotions and reach a level of calm and midfulness. To do that, we must first become aware of the emotion and allow it to surface in a safe and kind space.
Here is how to practice.
- Sit in a comfortable seat, spin tall, shoulders relaxed, with eyes closed or slightly cast down.
- Set a timer for 10 to 15 minutes.
- Be in an observers seat watching what is happening with you without interfering and/or judging.
- Take a deep breath and let it all out.
- Allow your thoughts, your emotions and your sensations to come up.
- Acknowledge the experience by naming it. Emotions that may come to mind are “anger”, “excitement, “anxious”, “thinking”. Sensations could be “shoulders tight”, “belly aches”, “sleepy”..
- Accept the experience with a mental note with “I see you”, then let the emotion go. .
- Take a deep breath and repeat the AAA method for the duration of your practice.
This practice allows you to bring the emotions, thoughts and sensations out of a deep dark well into the light of kindness and wisdom.
Reach out to your people
You are not on an island. Whatever you are experiencing, other people in your community are going through it too. Check on friends and family and share how you feel with no shame and no judgment. We are social creatures, and we need our community for comfort, fortitude and support.
Whatever you are going through, share it with your community. Know that you are awesome and that you make the world a better place.
